In a word? "Chaos" :D

No, really... it's been an adjustment, but not an absolute nightmare. This morning, I got all three dressed and then let Matthew watch the Muppets on my bed while I tried to brush my teeth and wash my face. Just as my face was fully soaped up, I heard Cookie whimpering--so I instruct her to move away from the baby and the whimpering stops... so I proceed to rinse my face and dry it. I open the bottom of the shades in the bathroom as I brush my teeth and let them look out the window: Cookie gets one window and the baby gets the other.

So we're settling in.

Cookie definitely has a possessiveness about me that is difficult sometimes. She will go around and proclaim "MY mommy" or "MY daddy" to Mike (she just did it now as the baby crawled in my direction). I have to tell her that I am Matthew, Cookie AND baby's mommy and we have to share. Often I wind up with both girls on my lap as they'll argue over "mommy".

Cookie calls many primary caregivers "mommy"--her current foster mom and that family's two grown daughters plus the main daycare woman she's attached to. Likewise, she will call important men in her life "daddy". It's not really an indication of her remembering us.

Thankfully, the baby isn't a clingy baby. She really only wants mommy when she's ready to nap or when she's not feeling well. That being said, she's been sick for 2 days. So mommy's lap has seen a LOT of action.

Cookie is also somewhat afraid of the baby--who no doubt, is a bit rough. But Cookie gets to where the baby just moves in her direction and Cookie starts up with "Ouch! Ouch!" Cookie actually has a few of these tactics. "Ouch!", "Hold!" and "Diaper!" are her laments for when she doesn't want to do something or doesn't want something to happen. So she tries to distract you with "hold" or "diaper" and she tries to ward off whatever she anticipates being problematic with "ouch". But really, she's pretty easy to manage. High needs for sure; but if you know that and are up for it--it's very doable.

I give her choices: she can hold my hand or be carried. In the airport on our way here, she thought I was joking and ran off like it was a game. I promptly caught up to her and picked her up. When her screaming didn't get me to let her go, she decided she'd hold my hand when she walked. It hasn't been a problem since (although she's been reminded that she would be carried on occasion).

The behaviorist working with her current foster parents implemented "time outs". We've used them maybe 3 times (kicking and throwing without saying "sorry" and then for running off and not coming back in a restaurant. It was pretty empty, but she needs to come back when called and I tried 3 times with a warning that she was headed for "time out"). She's smart as a WHIP: she knows exACTly what you're saying. It's kind of amazing. But she's 2... which is just trouble and testing boundaries. Thankfully we have similar discipline (or rather "management") styles as her current foster parents.

And she's occasionally helpful with the baby--so it's not that bad. She hears Mike and I looking for the baby's bottle and Cookie will find one and give it to the baby. Another time she tried to "help" the baby onto a rocking horse (wish I'd had a camera). Then all three engaged in a tickle fight. So it's not all difficult.

We went to the nature museum (just she and Matthew with me) and Mike took Cookie & Matthew to the park. Today I took the older two to visit with some of Cookie's relatives here at the pizza place her uncle runs. She's been really great with all of it. And I managed to wash her curly-girl hair (which I was worried about).

When we leave the house she asks if we're going "home" and I tell her "not today--the airplane will come take us back, but not today--okay?" and she nods "yes" and goes on. It's not sad or crying or anything like that. HUGE, HUGE blessing. It would kill me if she were in pain or anguish over the visit.

So we're about to sit down for dinner now... then baths... then dance party before bed. :)